TRUST

TRUST

What has become “usual” for me these days is to respond to those who are struggling for some answers. People approach me with questions they are facing and I tell them that I can give them MY answers that I have discovered through mulling over what is out there and reaching deep inside me to extract my own that have formed through my experiences.

This morning someone asked me if I had written something on this delicate subject of TRUST, and I realized that I had really not written on this subject to the extent that I wanted to.

Going through my own experiences in life, I have come to believe that TRUST has to be earned. It comes with time, and one has to really listen to their gut. There is no quick recipe for building trust, for it is a unique relationship between two individuals, two entities - companies, corporations or an individual with the company.

There are two aspects of trust – trusting on a day to day basis all that is needed for your survival, and trusting people in a relationship.

The first is much easier of the 2 aspects, since in order to survive, at some level we have to learn to trust things on a day to day basis, and of course it comes with a price, since external factors are not in our control. But we need to remember that we always have a choice …

For example:

- You go to a grocery store to buy food, vegetables and such. You trust that these are quality products that have been put there for your use after being checked. Yes you do read labels, but that is not because you do not trust them, but because you have a choice between products; you still have the choice to trust the words on the labels.

- You admit your child in a school, trusting the school and its people to provide the best for your child.

- You go to an auto repair shop trusting that they will not cheat you.

- You work in a company, trusting that the company will meet your needs.

- You invest your money, trusting your own gut that you have made the right choices.

Now let’s talk about the second aspect of trust, the more critical aspect - that of trusting people you have a relationship with.

Trust cannot be hurried. It is a process. Trust is built over a period of time, after your own inner evaluation, which one has to become smart in developing ones own self evaluation process that by and large works.

One also needs to keep in mind that trust is fragile and can be easily broken.

Another critical factor to remember is that Trust cannot be based on fear.

In my opinion, some basic principles to remember would be:

- Is the person spiritual, someone who values ethics and principles and lives by them in their own life?
- Is the person ruled by money?
- What does the person have to gain from this relationship with you?
- Is the person guided by external circumstances?
- Is the person struggling for his own answers?
Certainly avoid those:

- who sympathize too much.
- who talk behind your back in a negative manner.
- whose world revolves around materialism and external factors.
- who are obsessed and addicted about such things that they will do anything and everything to get what they want.
- who are so competitive that they will do anything to get in your way.
- who suck out the life force out of you, who leave you feeling depleted, drained and miserable, who have a permanent field of negative energy/vibrations all around them.

The fact of life is that one cannot trust anyone and everyone. One needs to learn how to differentiate between what can be trusted and what cannot. It will largely depend on your own principle that you live by, your gut instinct, and the ability to listen to your own gut.

Relationships are critical to the success of wholesome living. Where there is no trust, there is a relationship, but not the kind that will leave you happy, content and peaceful. Relationship between two souls, (or any 2 beings, those with animals and plants included) needs to be based on trust for it to be complete.

I have absolute faith that two Souls come together for a Divine reason. Since the reason is Divine, how can it not be based on TRUST? Where there is trust, there is nurturing, enriching, caring, unselfishness, no matter who the relationship is with – between spouses, siblings, parent-child, relatives, friends, or any two living beings (that have the capacity to respond).

Remember that you cannot pick your blood relatives, but you can certainly choose all others.

Relationship between those who you live with on a daily basis is critical to your survival, for interaction is on a daily basis. These need to make you feel loved and cared for, for human beings are creatures with emotions and feelings, which play a critical role in the growth process. You need to be able to trust them.

All other critical relationships in your life, like friends, doctors, personal coaches also need to be such that you feel nourished and content.

As far as friends go, one does not need hundreds of friends, but one trustworthy friend who can enrich you in ways that your Soul needs. It does not matter how many friends you have but who you have for a friend.

Choose your doctors with care, those you can question without fear, trusting that they are putting your care to the forefront.

Choose a personal coach you can trust is very important, for they play a big role in your growth process. They should be able to put you in a place of discomfort with care, and you should be able to trust their judgment. They do not tell you what you want to hear but what you should hear. They urge you to go inwards, question yourself and enable you to find your own answers. (I have written quite a bit on this subject in another blog.)

Above all TRUST YOUR OWN SELF, for ultimately this is the only trust that you do not rely on others for!

WHEN YOU TRUST GOD, YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE ALRIGHT. :)